


Where Love Is Great

by Eustacia Vye (eustaciavye)



Category: Bourne Trilogy (Movies)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-03
Updated: 2011-12-03
Packaged: 2017-10-26 19:33:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/287063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eustaciavye/pseuds/Eustacia%20Vye
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Nicky ran, it was because she thought Jason Bourne was going to kill her. That was the last thing he had on his mind.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Where Love Is Great

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Roxie Ann (pluvial_poetry)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pluvial_poetry/gifts).



And as my love is siz'd, my fear is so.  
Where love is great, the littlest doubts are fear;  
Where little fears grow great, great love grows there.  
\- Shakespeare, "Hamlet"

 

Nicky sat in the cafe, her eyes closed as the breeze blew through her hair. Alone again, this time far off the grid. If she had known this was where her life was going to lead, she would have done it years ago when she first met Jason Bourne. He had been mesmerizing, and as much as she was supposed to have been neutral, it had been impossible. His eyes had tracked her whenever they saw each other, his words always seemed to carry hidden meanings. They would have had to disappear for anything to go beyond the training program, and neither had been willing to do that.

Nicky sipped at her flavored coffee, not really seeing the city around her. It didn't matter where she was, actually. It wasn't where she had thought she was supposed to be, and she was still alone with her swirling thoughts and _if only._

Part of the problem was not knowing where the triggers lay, or what safe guards the program would have put into place if he did run. The government would never simply let millions of dollars in training disappear. In her fantasies he was willing to turn his back on the program, and she left without a backward thought. It never happened, no matter how much she sometimes wished it would. _It was difficult for me. With you. You really don't remember, do you?_ If he lost his memory, then that explained so much. It explained the soulless, empty way he looked at her. He didn't remember her, didn't remember what could have been. And here she was, being a sentimental fool for wondering where her Jason had gone. It didn't matter; she supposed she was lucky that he hadn't been interested in killing her along with everyone else involved in that program. He let her go, so she had to count herself lucky for that much.

A shadow fell over her table, and Nicky nearly dropped her coffee mug in shock when she saw the familiar boyish face and tousled dark hair. "Are you saving this seat for anyone?"

"No," she replied, voice more even than she thought it would be. "You can sit there if you like."

He smiled at her, eyes crinkling in the corners. "You're hard to find. Harder than I thought it would be."

"I know places," Nicky replied, managing to keep her raging thoughts in check. Jason Bourne was here. He had tracked her down. He seemed to have no intention of killing her.

Jason slowly reached across the table and grasped her hand. There were rough spots on his hand, not quite calluses, and Nicky thought perhaps that she should run and hide. Maybe this was his way of lowering her defenses before he killed her.

"I don't remember what you do," he said slowly. "I get flashes of things. They don't always make sense. But I remember your smile. I remember wanting to make it happen more often." He looked at her intently. "I was a better person then, wasn't I? I was more than just a killing machine."

"I don't think you were ever just a machine," Nicky told him in quiet tones. "You never were that way to me."

"How far...?"

Nicky smiled faintly, amused at the hesitance in his voice. Since when was Jason Bourne unsure about anything? "Never more than that. Than this," she added, looking down at his hand over hers. "You were in training, and we didn't want to screw that up."

"Maybe we should have," he told her quietly. He smiled sadly at her when she looked up at him in shock. "I can't say that I'm a good man, Nicky. I don't even remember who I used to be. But I was better when I was around you, I know that much. I wanted to be more." He rubbed her palm with his fingertips and watched her lips part. "I can't get the past back, but I can start over again, can't I? With you?"

She should say no. She should run. The coffee was still hot, would sting and delay him long enough for her to get away. There was nowhere she could go, but nowhere meant that there would be no pattern. She could pick a random place at the airport and _run._

"Yes," she said instead, hearing her own voice choke up with emotion. "Yes, we can."

***

Nicky's apartment was a monthly rental and contained hardly anything in it. There were few personal touches and few belongings, which would make it easier for her to run if she had to. The view of the ocean was fantastic, and it was calming to look at from the relative safety of the apartment. It felt strange to bring Jason there, when she had thought of this as a place to hide from him. He took in the look and feel of the apartment, then turned to her with and amused expression. "You've been hiding from me, is that it?"

"The thought crossed my mind that you might want to kill me," Nicky told him. "You weren't exactly happy about the project, and I was part of it."

"But you didn't do this to me. You didn't make them come after me, you didn't have their goons kill Marie."

"No, I didn't," Nicky agreed. Something in her was sad about the mention of Marie. Was he still hung up on her, then?

Jason cupped her face in one hand, thumb tracing the curve of her chin. "No, you're not the one that thinks people are disposable. You don't take lives for granted, even working for them. Somehow they didn't change that about you."

"So what now?" she asked, a slight rasp to her voice. She might have had dreams of this before. She might have wanted this too much before.

He kissed her, soft and gentle. She could have moved out of his grasp if she wanted to, but she didn't want to. Jason's tongue slid over the edge of her lip, and Nicky parted them without any further urging. This was a slow and sensual exploration, just his lips and tongue stroking hers. He had one hand on her face and the other at her hip, and Nicky was the one to pull him in closer so that she was flush against him.

This was real, this was real, it was actually happening and there was nothing to stop it from happening. There was no program to get in the way, no potential triggers to make everything fall apart.

Nicky ran her hands along Jason's back and pulled his shirt out from his pants. She wanted to touch his bare skin, wanted to feel it flex and move beneath her fingertips. He smiled against her mouth, then ran his hands down her back to caress her rear. Nicky pulled impatiently at his shirt, breaking their kiss so that she could pull it off over his head. It caught on his chin, making them both laugh nervously. If anything, that proved this was really happening and not just a dream. People didn't make little silly goofs like that, and it proceeded more like a raunchy romance novel in fantasies. She pulled off her own top, standing there in her bra and jeans taking in the sight of him. There were marks and scars on his chest, something else she wouldn't have imagined for him. She touched them lightly, then leaned in and kissed the marks before he could stop her. Jason sighed a little, his own hands ghosting over her unmarred skin.

Their mouths met again, and they stumbled toward her bedroom. Nicky managed to get the button and fly of his pants undone before they got to the door, and she helped to undo her own when he couldn't get them. They shimmied out of their pants and Nicky stepped backward until she hit the edge of her bed. She beckoned Jason to follow her, which he did, devouring her mouth with his the entire way. Nicky fell backward onto the bed and Jason fell forward. She couldn't help but laugh a little as the air left her lungs in a startled woosh. Jason grinned and then moved to kiss her again. "I imagined this a little differently," he murmured as he moved to kiss her neck.

"Oh? What did you think would happen?" she asked, curious.

"I'd sweep you off your feet and somehow I'd know how to pick up from where we left off."

"This is already farther than where we left off," Nicky pointed out.

Jason's smile was boyish and made Nicky grin in response. "This is very true. Shall we see how far we'll go?"

Nicky snorted and wrapped her arms around him to pull him down for a kiss. "Trust me, Jason. You're going far today."

His laughter was partly relieved and easily smothered by her kiss. Her bra came off easily, and he traced her sides until he came to her hip. Nicky instinctively spread her legs wider to allow him to settle comfortably between them. His hand came between them to stroke her through her panties, and she made a soft sighing sound of pleasure. She ran her own hands down his back and grasped the curve of his rear as best as she could, her own hand sliding beneath the waistband of his underwear to continue touching his skin.

She nearly protested when Jason moved down from her neck, but he kissed his way down her breasts and licked circles around her nipples before heading further down. He drew down her panties and threw them aside, then kissed her stomach. He kept going, down past the unruly curls to blow his breath along the dampening folds. He leaned in and licked at her delicately at first, then he put her legs over his shoulders to really dive in and thrust his tongue inside her. Nicky cried out and writhed, pulling at her sheets. He continued, tongue moving quickly as his hands stroked the backs of her thighs. He stopped when she was close, making her mewl in protest.

"I want to feel this," Jason murmured, stripping off his underwear and then pushing his length into her. "I want to feel you come."

The husky growl in his voice made Nicky shiver. She held his hips and pulled him in deeper as he thrust into her, balancing his weight over her on his hands. She watched his face as best as she could, because she kept wanting to arch back and let her eyes slide shut with the sensation of him inside her, that this was finally happening after all. She bucked against him, panting and breathless. Her orgasm nearly took her by surprise, and she came with a sharp cry. Jason grunted and then moved faster, harder, making her cry out in pleasure again. His hips stuttered and he tried to abruptly pull out of her, but she wouldn't let him. He came himself, head falling forward and his eyes shut tight. "Oh," he said as he exhaled, a half smile on his face. "Why didn't we do this before again?"

"Work," she said with a lazy, satisfied smile, stretching out beneath him languidly.

"Neither of us are working anymore," Jason commented.

"No, we're not," Nicky agreed slowly, opening her eyes to see where he was going with it.

He leaned down to kiss her lips. "Then there's no reason not to do this again."

Nicky laughed and kissed him. "No, none at all."

Maybe going on the run hadn't been such a bad idea after all. She hadn't been running from something, she'd been running _to_ it and hadn't known.

The End


End file.
